Week 7-11 (31 May - 30 June, Days 26-44)

Hey All!

Its been a little while so I'll catch y'all up on what's been going on...

Memorial Day Holiday

Memorial Day weekend was good, and quiet. Something I very much needed since I spend most of my days here with 40+ people in a high stress environment. Of course the flight back to Arizona from home didn't help. Not only was I leaving my comfort zone to go back to a place I've had difficulty enjoying (c'mon its intense school and barely any time off, I'm miserable cause I'm trying!) but the flight back was less than peaceful. From Huntsville to Denver was alright, it was getting from Denver to Tucson that took a little work. I already felt like I was getting back too late, I had no idea what was going to happen. My flight was at first delayed about an hour for some routine work (why wouldn't you schedule that in?), then it was delayed another hour, pushing the time I was going to leave to after 8. Soon, after several more delays it became apparent that I wasn't going to get out of Denver without hopping on another flight. Fighting through throngs of people who had the same realization, and after a brief argument with the attendant about the bag I had checked, I got myself on another flight. I was told my bag would arrive a half hour after I got to Tucson (11:30pm). I waited until after midnight to find someone to ask about the flight, only to discover that they hadn't updated the arrivals television to reflect that my original flight was cancelled and my bag wouldn't be in until the next day. Needless to say, PT the next morning wasn't a party.

Class

As far as class goes, we recently began the third section of the school, so far its more interesting than the last two blocks. Unfortunately the lack of windows in the classroom tends to blur everything we do...they say its to help us focus, but honestly it puts me right to sleep, which brings me to my next explanation.

Healthy Stuff...or not...

Nutrition here SUCKS! I can do the best I can (which honestly still isn't very good) when I'm home, but considering I tend to only be home between 1730 (5:30pm) and 0430/0500 (4:30/5am) I find it hard to motivate myself to cook something healthy during that time...which means I take shortcuts which result in unbalanced meals. I also don't like taking the time to make myself a lunch, creating more issues when I need to eat on post. Add to that the fact that I have been drinking MAJOR amounts of caffeinated beverages to keep myself awake in class, and you get pure unhealthiness. I honestly think that's the biggest contribution to my lack of energy, motivation and general happiness while I'm here, and I still care about working on it. I keep waiting to get into a routine so I can better manage my time. Aaaand once again that leads into the next topic!

The Monument Fire

The damn fire.
http://azstarnet.com/news/local/wildfire/collection_3f9cf44c-96ec-11e0-8fb4-001cc4c03286.html?photo=1
I was finally getting to routine stage when a dumb fire broke out 10 miles from my apartment. Talk about distracting, its been literally 10 days, and its totally screwed up every schedule and routine I had organized for myself. Suddenly we have to report at odd times, PT is cancelled but maybe not, GAFPB is cancelled then it isn't and we find ourselves at a pool at 0500, oh and lets not forget the lack of weekends! I had already felt like I hadn't gotten any relaxation time since memorial day, lets add a fire to make things a little more stressful!!

The Upside of Arizona

I feel like I'm ranting here, and I guess I am. So lets dissect this, I LOVE the National Forests and Outdoor activities in this area, I LOVE my friends in class and my new climbing friends, so its not all that bad. The problem is mostly that I only have 4 hours in the evenings and hopefully the weekends to spend time doing the things I love. In fact, I would even go as far to say that I'd love what we work on in class (cause its getting pretty badass now, can't lie) except there are no windows here so therefore it sucks.

Being here has shown me more and more about myself than I ever imagined. I've learned that I'm useless without access to horses, particularly ones that like to jump over stuff as much as I do. I've learned that I hate being alone, not single alone, but alone with no dog or friend or family in my apartment with me. Luckily my friends, Garrett and Robin, have covered down on that and occasionally stop by to keep me company :) This is great from the perspective that I'm rarely alone to think and analyze myself to death, and also because the constant threat (are there good threats? cause this would be one) of someone stopping by, causes me to be slightly neater than I would be otherwise.

All Caught Up

As I write this, the 4th of July 4 day weekend is ending. I'm sad because the free time is over, and because that means I have to go back to the hectic day to day around here. There's an upside though, without an insane airport story like the one I had over memorial day, I've actually had time to relax and reflect (As well as work on my climbing skills, which I'll explain shortly). I have 8 weeks left here, and I swear they will change my attitude, my health, my body, and my life. Watch out Alabama I'm coming home a new woman!!!

PS. I love everyone reading this! And I promise my next blog will be more positive! (All this ranting is the reason I haven't updated in so long. I've struggled a lot with negative feelings in the month I haven't been on here, but those are behind me now, and I'm working to improve my confidence, attitude, and faith.) Thank you all for your patience!